Me and My Hijab

6 Jun

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

 (In the name of Allah, the Beneficient, the Merciful)

My relationship with hijab has been a particularly temperamental one but I wouldn’t want it any other way.  Alhumdulillah (praise be to the Almighty) I was born into a Muslim family.  However, I personally disagree with the idea of following the religion of one’s forefathers without any independent study.  I have always been a ponderer from ever since I can remember.  The concept of religion for me is a fascinating one.  I have forever been curious about my purpose in this world and always seem to have an extensive list of questions ready to ask my learned friends.

My parents brought me up as a Muslim, though I was not practising.  I celebrated Eid and knew that alcohol was haram (forbidden) but it didn’t really go beyond that until I began to actively exercise my mind as a pre-teen.  I began by asking my school friends questions about religion and faith, this later extended to asking teachers.  Though I was curious, I didn’t begin actively practising Islam because I felt it was a mammoth task.  I didn’t want to wear hijaab and I didn’t like the idea of waking up before dawn to pray.  These things didn’t seem practical to me at that time.

Having said that, I have had periods in my life where I have consciously decided to practice my faith.  Wearing my version of hijab when I fancied and reading fascinating stories about the different prophets of Islam.  These periods would last for a few weeks at the most, and then I’d fall back into my old ways.

Recently however, the Almighty placed an unexpected catalyst in my life.  A loved one was suddenly taken away from my family.  At first I couldn’t comprehend or absorb what was happening.  I felt lost and uneasy.  This feeling was overwhleming.  It finally hit me that I have no control over what may happen in the future.  It finally hit me that my loved ones could be taken away from me at any point without prior warning.  It finally hit me that I am not immortal and one day I will be held answerable to my actions.  I had never felt emotion like this before in my life.  I believe though, that the Almighty works in mysterious ways, something positive was born out of a misfortune.

This catalyst directed me to turn to the Almighty and ask for guidance.  I then began to pray some of my daily prays and began reciting Quran in order to build a rapport with the Almighty.

I remember thinking to myself ‘I have no time to waste. I need to make things happen now’.  I couldn’t believe I was thinking like this.  I was thrilled that I had finally found the passion I had been waiting for.  I then decided to wear hijab properly and insha’Allah (God-willing) full time.  I was nervous about going back to university with my headscarf on, wondering how people would react.  In hindsight I realise that I had nothing to worry about.  My friend Alex was the first to see me, her reaction was refreshing, though she acknowledged it, she said nothing about it!  Walking into the seminar I got a few odd looks but I assumed that was because we were late as usual, so I wasn’t concerned too much.  My feelings of paranoia eventually faded and questions about my recent ‘conversion’ were welcomed.

Since then I have lost some ‘friends’, at first this was quite distressing but Alhumdulillah (praise be to the Almighty) I have made so many more friends who accept me for who I am and encourage me to practise my faith.  The Almighty really does work in mysterious ways!

The Almighty states in the Quran:

“You may dislike something although it is good for you, or like something although it is bad for you: The Almighty knows but you do not.” Chapter 2, Verse 216.

In retrospect I can fully appreciate these words.

I cannot express how much I love wearing my hijab.  The feeling of empowerment when walking into a room can’t be matched.  Walking through the city centre and receiving the greeting of ‘Assalamu-alaykum’ from complete strangers is wonderful.

I understand that wearing hijab is a serious matter, I am an ambassador of Islam.  For this reason, I am striving to reach hijab perfection.  I know that I may have a long way to go, with many obstacles in my path but insha’Allah (God-willing) I will succeed.

 

~ Ifrana Wahid

 

Read more about Ifrana here

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7 Responses to “Me and My Hijab”

  1. azkaahass June 6, 2011 at 12:50 am #

    Came across it on twitter. Welldone sis x

  2. onelittlepixie June 6, 2011 at 1:09 am #

    Jazakallah khayr, thank you for reading (: x

  3. Black Muslimah June 6, 2011 at 1:50 am #

    Beautiful, touching post. I too was a curious little girl. That questioning led me away from Christianity and to Islam. Thank you for sharing. ASA

    • onelittlepixie June 6, 2011 at 1:58 pm #

      Jazakallah khayr. It was my pleasure. Thank you for reading x

  4. Kizzy June 6, 2011 at 12:50 pm #

    Truly inspiring and interesting post. First blog that I have actually read in full. Looking forward to more of your blog posts. Insha’Allah (: x

    • Me and My Hijab Admin June 6, 2011 at 12:57 pm #

      Assalaamu alaikum. Thank you for your comment, I am sure the author will greatly appreciate it. Please subscribe to receive posts as they are published. – Admin

    • onelittlepixie June 6, 2011 at 1:58 pm #

      Jazkallah khayr, thank you. Means a lot (: x

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